


amidst all tribulations.

by Suisen (sukiiro_cchi)



Category: SK8 the Infinity (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, Kyan Reki Deserves Nice Things, Kyan Reki Needs a Hug, Kyan Reki is a Ray of Sunshine, M/M, Memory Loss, Pain, Sad Hasegawa Langa, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:02:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29823948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sukiiro_cchi/pseuds/Suisen
Summary: Langa meets INFERNO, a mechanic specializing in making, modifying, and repairing things related to skateboarding, and he sees his lost friend within INFERNO's enticing, crimson eyes, blazing like the sun—
Relationships: Chinen Miya & Kyan Reki, Hasegawa Langa & Kyan Reki, Hasegawa Langa/Kyan Reki
Comments: 7
Kudos: 107





	amidst all tribulations.

Many things are fated to be lost in the cruel passage of time, but among all of those that were lost, Hasegawa Langa only held one thing still close to his heart and relieved the memories he had with that person every chance he got. _Move on,_ the people around him would say. _You could achieve better things if you forget about him_ , his _rival_ had said.

What _better things_? What could be _better_ than meeting the person in his memories again? What... what would be the use of those said better things if he didn't have _him_ by his side? Even now, every time he skates, he would think of what if _he_ would be there to welcome him back again.

Whenever he reaches the finish line, he expects that _he_ would be there, with _his_ usual, bright smile — but _he's not._ Sometimes, Langa asks himself what could have happened if he had not chosen to partcipate in the tournament, if he had not let himself break the promise even if it meant sacrificing the thrill he could feel while racing with ADAM.

As the days passed by without _him_ by his side, he couldn't help but realize— that he isn't happy at all. There's nothing fun about skating anymore— not if _that person_ was not by his side.

_Years pass by, and the clock continues to tick— time doesn't wait for him. It doesn't wait for the apologies that must be said. It doesn't wait for him to find the courage he needs. ~~If he would ever be able to find that courage.~~_

SNOW is one of the best skateboarders in the whole world, and is only second to ADAM in Japan, but somehow, it felt like something was very... very wrong. It felt like something was missing, and he could never find that anymore. He understood, that through his choices, he had made an irrevocable mistake, but at that time, he thought that _he_ thought the same, so when _he_ said that _he_ was afraid, Langa couldn't think of anything at all. He thought that there was absolutely nothing to be afraid of.

The next day, he realized that he shouldn't have said those words at all— trauma is something that shouldn't be taken lightly. He hadn't known— _he_ hadn't known that _he_ was traumatized by someone that he was having fun with.

But that doesn't make what he did alright. He didn't know? Why didn't he? Why couldn't he realize it, when he was by his side every single day? How could he had not realized it when they were always side-by-side? How could he have dismissed it when he noticed that there was something wrong about Reki— _when he noticed that his smiles weren't as happy as before, when his eyes no longer shine when skateboarding, when the happiness in his voice seemed to be forced every single second?_

How could he have dismissed the promise he had made with his best friend— ~~_why did he even make that promise in the first place, if he could not keep it?_~~

Why did he think that what was thrilling for him would be _fun_ for Reki as well? How could he dare say that it was exciting, when his friend was traumatized by what had happened? Why did he let himself trigger his friend's trauma? Can... can he even call Reki his friend, when all that he has done was _hurt_ him? Why is it only now that he realized that he would have been nothing without Reki— that he was... nothing without Reki? Why is it only now that he realized that Reki had been the only light amidst the darkness— the emptiness that had been engulfing him when his father had left?

_Why couldn't he have done more for Reki?_

He didn't even realize that he was staring at the skateboard that Reki had made solely for him that he was still using now. Even after ten years, he couldn't move on. How could he dare to move on, when he was the one who made his friend stop? Even after seven years, he was still using this skateboard, because other than this skateboard, there was nothing else left that reminded him that Reki was his— _was once his._

It was tattered, and scratches were all over. It was on the verge of being destroyed. Before, Reki had checked it every single time for him— as to check if there is something he could improve or something he should fix. _But Reki was not here_ — and he had no idea where he was. He didn't even know if he had the right to meet him again, after all this time. However, if he wanted to continue using this skateboard, he needed to see someone that could fix it— and he didn't need anyone to make a new one for him.

He remembered Miya coming to S with a brand new skateboard just recently. Perhaps... whoever Miya could trust with his skateboard, he could entrust his treasure as well. That time, he heard people whispering that Miya's skateboard was the work of someone famous and was good at what he does. When ADAM noticed that he was interested in it, he said that the mechanic who made it was referred to as INFERNO.

Strangely, even ADAM, who had access to every information and data that could be found with his disgustingly creepy habit of background checking every person he met and he took interest in, didn't have any clue as to what the identity of INFERNO was. He didn't ask him about it, though— it was just that every time Langa seemed to have an interest in someone, ADAM crushes them then tells him that that person was not worth their time. So, Langa just stopped showing much interest to any other person, since every time he does so, ADAM keeps stepping over his boundaries.

A sad, frustrated smile engulfed his features. He didn't want ADAM to do that for him. If anything, he found it revolting. He didn't show his emotions much, since he didn't care about anything except his sun and the thrill he feels from skateboarding, but as time passed by and he continued to think of what else made Reki displeased of ADAM, he realized how aside from ADAM's skating prowess, there was nothing else good about him.

He should have chosen Reki and his promise with him, really. If he had, he wouldn't be lamenting his past right now— when he couldn't even gather the courage to correct his mistakes back then and now as well.

He thought of how Reki was doing right now— perhaps he was still skating somewhere far out of his reach. He wondered if he had still kept his love for skateboarding. If so, who would he talking about it now? He missed his conversations with Reki. All of his smiles, giggles, pouts— _everything about him._ He wondered who Reki's closest friend was now—

—he stopped for a moment.

The thought of Reki's smiles not for him and not because of him, made him want to halt thinking about this— there was this strange and uncomfortable feeling that was bubbling up his chest and somehow, somehow, it was really _painful_. He thought of how those eyes will sparkle as he continued to talk about the things he loved— and how those were no longer for him, and him alone. If it was Miya, he probably wouldn't be feeling this way—Miya and Reki go way back, it would make sense if they still contact each other, and the recipient of Reki's _everything_ was now Miya— it still wasn't calming.

 _What if— what if Miya and Reki were still in contact?_ And he... on the other hand, was left with the unknown?

Does Reki think of him like how much he thinks of him?

Does Reki also feel this strange pain in his chest?

Does Reki... still remember him at all?

Will Reki be happy if they met again?

Langa narrowed his eyes and closed them tightly, shaking away all the bad thoughts. He swore— someday, someday... he would meet Reki again, then apologize, then they would talk like always again, and Reki would beam at him and look at him as if he's the only one in his world—

Langa stopped.

For now, he needed to do something about his skateboard. He wasn't in the mood to go to S tonight. In fact, he was never excited to go to S again, but the thought that Reki might be there, no matter how slim the chances were, made him attend. Reki was never there, though— but no matter how many times his hopes were crushed, he didn't stop... _because could this even compare to what Reki felt when he said those words to him, as if he didn't care about his own wellbeing, as if he didn't care about Reki's words?_

* * *

After asking some of his acquaintances as to where INFERNO's workshop may be, he immediately headed there and was surprised to see a crowd— was INFERNO this amazing at what he does? What was even more shocking, however, was when he turned to look around, and saw Miya staring at him blankly.

"The audacity." Miya probably didn't mean for him to hear it, but he heard it regardless. What did he mean by his words, though? "Why don't you do whatever business you have here get done by your best rival ever, the indomitable, ADAM-sama?"

"Huh?" He was genuinely confused. Why did it seem like Miya had some sort of grudge against him? No— it couldn't be.

"Whatever." Miya shrugged. "You here to see the slime? After all these years... hah." After all these years...? Have I met INFERNO before?

"Uh, if you mean INFERNO, yes."

"Honestly, I really don't want to let you two meet. But knowing the slime, he would nag me again if he learns that I chased a customer off— and we're gathering too much attention. Let's go."

Langa followed after Miya, who started to lead him to the backdoor entrance of the workshop.

* * *

"Oh, Miya!" He heard a cheery voice call. "Do you need something done with your skateboard?" The voice's owner asked Miya, rushing towards him. The way he was fussing over Miya reminded him of someone— but he couldn't quite piece it together. "Oh, and you are?"

"I just came to check on you. If I didn't come, you would be overworking yourself again."

"What— I wouldn't be! I always keep my health in check, y'know! How about you?!"

"I'm doing much better than you!" Miya scoffed. "And? You're updated with literally everything related to skateboarding, so how could you not know the all-famous SNOW?"

Langa took a good look at the man Miya was conversing with. His whole face was covered by a protective mask, and his fiery, red hair was tied in a small ponytail, reaching up to his shoulders. "Excuse me, are you INFERNO?"

As if that snapped the person out of his stupor, he suddenly flinched. He removed his protective mask, leaving only his goggles. "Oh, how rude of me to a very important prospective client!" He chuckled, raising his hand as if to ask for a handshake. Langa also did the same.

Before he was able to shake the man's hand, Miya spoke to interrupt them: " _Reki_ , are you sure you want to shake a celebrity's hands with your filthy ones? And your goggles."

"Ah! That was so close! Thank you, Miya!" He grinned— and it was so much, so much like Reki's— his smile was _breathtaking_ and—

He didn't notice that he was thinking for too long when INFERNO waved in front of him, now without his goggles; those beautiful crimson eyes looking straight at him. "Nice to meet you, SNOW! As you have said before, I'm INFERNO."

"...Reki?"

"Uh," Reki looked like he didn't know what to do for a moment. "Yes, uh, I'm Reki?"

"Reki— I—" he cut off his own words, he wanted to apologize, first and foremost. "It's been a long time," he began, "I'm really not sure what to say but, I, I apologize for..."

"...uh," Reki interrupted. "I'm sorry, I'm not following."

"Huh?"

"Have... have we met before?"

* * *


End file.
